Welcome Adriana

Hello, my name is Adriana Heskett. My husband is in his 4th (and final) year of residency for OB/GYN. We have three kids, Emily (5), Palmer (3), and Logan (3 months). I currently work from home as a financial aid administrator for a local college.

~We are so glad that Adriana has joined us! She is a valuable resource for us and it's so great of her to offer to share some of her knowledge!

Adriana has worked in financial aid for 8 years and has a lot of experience/knowledge when it comes to student financial aid. There have been a lot of changes recently with regards to deferment/forbearance/repayment of loans and sometime soon Adriana has offered to write a post explaining how it affects us in residency and those going into practice!!!

I CANNOT wait to read this, Thank Adriana!!!~

Fabulous meals in just a few minutes

I wanted to share a great new recipe resource you'll appreciate. My sister-in-law just gave me a subscription to Semi-homemade (by Sandra Lee). The recipes are really good and they are surprisingly quick. She uses a lot of frozen vegetables and quick cooking techniques. I love this magazine.

Yesterday, I made a baked chicken thigh seasoned with rosemary and thyme on a bed of roasted vegetables. The whole thing took under and hour (including chopping, cooking, and cleaning up). The night before, I made pan-fried porkchops with an apple topping, and potato cakes.

Along with these "cheater" recipes, she gives some great ideas for party settings and table arrangements. It truly is a wonderful source for pulling together an impressive party at the drop of a hat.

FYI: The recipes I just mentioned were in the Christmas menu edition (Dec/Jan).

Survivor Saturdays: Get Real

How much time do you spend wondering if you're meeting someone else's expectation? Doctors' wives are often judged by not only the outside world, but within their own circle of friends. Well, I'm here to tell you there isn't one woman out there who hasn't forgotten about an appointment, showed up to a nice event with spit-up on their shoulder, or failed miserably at making some fancy dish referred to by its French name. For some reason, we continue to perpetuate the myth that doctors' wives can do it all. Since I'm familiar with that pressure, too, I'm not going to tell you to ignore all of it. Instead, I'm going to share some of my secrets. I thought it would be nice if some of you chime in with some of your secrets, too. Let’s get real, ladies!

If you want to squeeze into a dress, but don't like your bumps and rolls to show... try Spanx. This undergarment is amazing and everyone wears them.

If you don't have much up top and don't want to undergo surgery, "cupcakes" do the trick. Slip them into your bra and you look sexy!

Keep a small pad of paper with you wherever you go, so you can jot things down as a reminder. I keep one in the car and one in my purse. I record people's names I just met, appointments I need to add to a calendar, grocery lists, and all kinds of things. If you have a place to write those kind of things down, you won't always be uptight about forgetting something.

Designate one cupboard, closet, or trunk for scooping up clutter when the doorbell rings unexpectedly. This is a life saver as long as you don't open the doors while the company is there. If your children are old enough, teach them to help you scoop up, too. They'll enjoy having a secret with you and you'll appreciate the extra hands.

Don't have time to whip together fancy foods for drop-in company? Follow some freeze-ahead recipes and keep them for the unexpected. Rules to follow: In a freezer, fish is good for about 2-3 months, chicken is good for about 6 months, beef is good for about a year. Potatoes don't freeze well, and vacuum baggies keep out freezer smells.

I want to share a new cookbook, Make-Ahead Meals for Busy Moms by Jane Doiron, that has just become available. I've been keeping an eye on this book after finding the author on twitter. I don't have a copy yet, but by what I saw on her website, this book includes easy meals you won't be embarrassed to serve company. She tells me there is a whole section on appetizers, too. I asked Jane if she would share a few quick appetizer recipes that appear in her book. She gladly provided the following recipes below. If you're interested in checking out the cookbook, go to http://www.makeaheadmealsforbusymoms.com

Bruschetta

Healthy and delicious!

8 plum tomatoes, diced
4 large garlic cloves, minced
½ cup chopped fresh basil leaves
¼ cup extra virgin olive oil
½ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon pepper
2 (4.75 oz.) bags Panetini Oven Baked Italian Toast (Garlic Parmesan)

~Prepare Up to One Day Ahead~

In a large mixing bowl, combine the tomatoes, garlic, basil, oil, salt, and pepper. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. Stir and drain before serving with baked Italian toasts. Serves 8.


Pear Bread

This is one of my favorites! It’s spicy, moist, and keeps well for days.

3 cans (15 oz. each) lite pear halves in extra light syrup, drained
½ cup canola oil
3 eggs
3¼ cups flour
1 cup sugar
3 teaspoons cinnamon
½ teaspoon ground cloves
½ teaspoon nutmeg
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup chopped walnuts

Preheat the oven to 350°F. Spray two 8 x 4 x 3-inch loaf pans with nonstick spray; set aside. In a large mixing bowl, mash the pears with a potato masher. Stir in the oil and eggs. In a medium bowl, combine the rest of the ingredients. Slowly add the dry ingredients to the pear mixture on low speed until thoroughly combined. Pour the batter equally into the loaf pans. Bake for 70 - 75 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Cool on a wire rack.

~Freezing Directions~

When completely cooled, wrap the bread in plastic wrap and place in a labeled freezer bag. Freeze up to 2 months.

Financial Resource

Physicians in Training just posted about a great resource on managing debt from medical school. It's called FIRST- Financial Information, Resources, Services, and Tools. They have information for both medical students and residents. I've just skimmed it, but it looks like a good source of information!

Interested?

I received this email and thought maybe some of us could share our stories. Go check out the blog and if you are interested email me and I can send you her contact info!

Good morning ~WOW...what a fantastic blog! I know how unique and challenging your situation is as Dr.'s wives - not first hand but watching my cousin and her husband through those years of internship and establishing a practice. If you, or any of your blog team members would be willing to share your stories in our community blog - which is for newlywed women - we'd love to have your input and insight.We have a variety of topics being addressed (military wives, 'older newlywed', etc) but none from your perspective. If you have any interest please let me know. Here's a link to our blog so you can check it out. I wish you all the most wonderful lives and think the idea that you are finding strength together is fantastic - which is what we hope to do with our site as well!http://www.shejustgotmarried.com/modules/blog

Denée Founder, She Just Got Married (dot com)

Quickie

Here's another website to check out potential physician job postings throughout the country...:) They are always interesting to check out...

http://careermd.com/

Contract Info for Physicians

This is a great article I found when looking through my 2009 MD Career Path journal from the New England Journal of Medicine.  It highlights the importance of finding a lawyer who specializes in Physician’s contracts and also some key matters that make a contract harder on a physician who decides to leave a practice. 
Physician Job Contracts
This is definitely one to share with your husbands.  Also, peruse the NEJM Career center for some other great articles.

For the MS1 and MS2s

My most recent post is about the Match process - most of you are already more than familar with the process but I know when I was the wife of an MS1 and 2 the process was always a mystery. For those who are interested: http://marriedtoamedicalstudent.blogspot.com/ I also post a few links that are helpful for learning about residency programs.

Survivor Saturday--My "Survival" Websites

I was reading through some of my favorite websites recently, and I realized how much I truly owe to the Internet for helping me survive my husband's residency. Not only was it a constant source of entertainment during those long, lonely call nights, but it also helped me get through those first months of motherhood when my family (and, many times) my husband couldn't be there to help. Here is a short list of my go-to websites--the ones that helped me then, and the ones that continue to help me during my husband's current wacky work schedule:

1. Mamasource.com--After I had my son almost three years ago, my mother told me about this website that she had discovered through an old high school friend of mine. All I had to do was enter my zip code, and I was immediately connected to other moms in my community. It was an amazing resource for me when I had so many questions as a new mother, and I didn't want to be constantly calling my mom or my pediatrician for answers. Other moms (like other wives) are such incredible founts of knowledge. I learned so much about different lifestyles and different ways of parenting. I also met an amazing group of mothers, who allowed my son and I to join their little play group. Those were my son's first experiences with other children, and he always had a great time, as did I. When we knew we would be moving back to our home state after B graduated from residency, I entered my new zip code into the Mamasource website and immediately asked about any moms groups in my new home town. I found a great one which is organized through a different website, and now, I'm one of the co-organizers! My son and I have learned so much about our new town and all its wonderful opportunities for families, and it's all because of this one website!

2. The Food Network's website--I've always loved watching "The Food Network", since its early days on cable TV. I've found over the years that the chefs have become more accessible to the average home cook, and their recipes have become easier to recreate. What I've always loved about the channel and its website is that I'll watch a show and think, "I can do that here at home." Then, I'll go to the website, look at the recipe, and realize that I actually can do it. I'm a huge fan of Giada de Laurentiis, and lately, I've been making more and more of her dinner and dessert recipes. Rachael Ray's meal ideas can also be very easy and great for kids. I always feel good when I make a healthy meal for my family, and the Food Network's website has helped me to do it more over the years.

3. My local hometown's website--This is different for everyone, but I've found the websites of the last few cities in which I've lived to be very helpful resources. My current hometown's site lists all the parks and trails in the city, several community events, and other pertinent information. Our parks and recreation department here is just amazing. They have activities for all ages, and everything is accessible through the website. My son and I recently attended a party for preschoolers at one of our community centers, and it just took a few clicks through the city's website to sign him up for the event. I can also find out about the hours of our local farmers' market and the schedule for the city pools. I highly recommend that anyone Google his/her local city's website and discover what's happening there.

4. Twitter.com and Facebook.com--Okay, so maybe these sites didn't help me survive residency, especially since I don't even think either of them existed five years ago. Or, if they did, I didn't know about them. However, they have helped me keep in touch with old friends (and new ones) more recently, and they are endless sources of entertainment. Also, I sometimes get updates and information on amazing events happening in my area or in my old hometown. I find both websites most helpful during my husband's super busy call shifts after my son's gone to bed.

5. Blogger.com--This one is pretty obvious. I still write posts for my very first blog on Blogger. With absolutely no previous coding experience, I've been able to keep my family and friends connected with what's been happening with my little family. Many of my friends use Blogger for the very same reason. It has allowed me to learn so much about myself as a writer. I've discovered a real enjoyment in expressing myself in this way. It has become one of my favorite creative outlets. Also, it has helped me connect with a lot of amazing women who are going through many of the same situations that I experienced just a few years ago. If "Lives of Doctor Wives" had been around then, it would have definitely been number one on this list!

There are many other great sites on the Internet, but these are the ones that I've visited the most over the past few years. I hope they're helpful to all of you, too!
Amanda--wife of an OB/GYN and current "survivor"

Edit to add: I just remembered that another great site for me is Netflix.com. For about $20 a month, I've been able to see more movies at home by myself or with my hubby over the past several years, than I've been able to go to the movie theater to see or to the video store to rent. The website is so user friendly, my movies come in the mail in about a day, I get to have three movies at a time, and there are no late fees. Plus, now that my husband as an XBox 360, we can stream some movies through his game system directly from our NetFlix account. Sorry if I sound like a commercial, but I've really enjoyed my membership, and it's helped me through some long call nights!

Compass Bank isn't the only one!!

My friend gave us the Compass Bank information (can be found on this blog) for a home mortgage in which they don't consider your debt in the calculations, as long as you are in deferement. Well, a couple from hubby's program recently put out a contract on a house, and I asked her what bank she used and what her rates were....

The local bank offered her 5.9% 30 fixed, no money down, $1,000 in closing costs because they are keeping the loan "in house" meaning they won't (can't) sell it on the secondary market.

I called two local banks where we are going and they told me the same thing...100% loan, closing costs are very low and they didn't see any problem in approving us, even though we havn't put in any paper work.

My other friend was offered 7.5% apr thru Compass Bank...so, we will likely save 1%, which is a ton of money over the long hall. The bank president, with whom I talked, acutally started laughing when I told him the rate Compass was offering.

Anyway, don't go straight to Compass...you do have choices!

Bank of America, with whom we have our current mortgage, told us to buzz off, in so many words, and that no one is doing 100% loans anymore.

Ha! It pays to shop around and ask questions. I did tell them my husband was a new doctor, just out of residency, blah blah blah...

Will keep you posted on what our final rate will be.

Cheers!

Family Fun

If you didn't get a change to read Bea's post on Finding Equanimity about Planning for Fun, I encourage you to do so. She really brings up a great point that if you want to do something with your spouse or family, whether it be going for a walk, getting chores done, or sitting around and relaxing together, you need to add it to your schedule and really make sure you follow through. Life can get overwhelming and if you don't take the time to work on relationships and have fun, even if it is just by yourself, things can get out of hand and the important stuff can fall through the cracks.

This got me thinking and as I was looking around the other day for bargains and inspirational posts, I stumbled upon this great post on Small Notebook about Pocket Change Date Night Ideas and how as medical students and residents we have such a tight budget, but still have needs to satisfy. This really hit a chord with me as I still remember the best date I ever had with Tom. We were still at college and hadn't been married that long, so things were new and exciting. We didn't have anything to do one night and were in the car thinking about what would be fun to do......but we didn't have any money really. We had some change in the car glove box and a full tank of gas. So we drove from Stillwater, OK to Tulsa. When we got there, we scraped together enough change to grab a bunch of $0.10 tacos and see a movie at the $0.25 movie theatre. We had the best time and I bet we didn't have more than $2.00 on us! Tom still talks about how much fun that was, him being a rich boy this was not something he was used to doing, hehe. But we loved it and we loved the fun time together and it hardly cost anything. Hopefully these two great posts will help you think of some new ways to keep family a priority!

I want to apologize for not posting in a while and letting the polls slip a little, with graduation, being sick, being pregnant, moving and just life, things have been a little crazy. I will be back on top of it ASAP!

Just can't get enough?

If you are just loving all of the doc talk on here and want some more, go check out another blog for medical spouses.

http://physiciansintraining.blogspot.com

They are looking for more contributors too, so if you are interested, be sure to let them know!

Laundry: White lab coats

For me the white lab coats are a nightmare, they get stains and then on top of that I have to iron them etc...
Anyone have good laundry tips for them?

life. money. hope.

I know several of you have mentioned that you are Dave Ramsey fans. Thought I would pass this Life Church series on. He has a three-part message you can watch online. I watched the first one today. Good stuff.

Complications

I don't know if any of you have had a chance to read Atul Gawande's books, but he is awesome. Complications is my favorite by him that I have read so far. It is a really good read to get an idea of what your husband will be going through. So, if you are home alone, or hubs is studying and you want a quiet activity, go pick it up!