Survivor Stories: It Gets Better, the Vacation Edition

by Jennifer, Survivor in Pediatric Ophthalmology


My husband and I had a conversation recently with one of his childhood friends.

Friend: Remember when we were all newlyweds, before kids, and we could travel to Cancun and lie on the beach for a week?

Dr. H: Um, when Jennifer and I were newlyweds, I was in med school and she made $19K a year…

We were young, and stupid, and broke. Our honeymoon was a long weekend in San Antonio. Our annual “vacation” meant a weekend at a B&B and ordering iced tea instead of water with dinner. Once we had kids, vacations were spent traveling to see our families 800 miles away. I went to a meeting with him once. That was fun.

Ten years later, older and wiser and financially stable, we can finally travel. Last summer, we took our kids on a Disney cruise.

It was awesome. 

Last month, Dr. H & I took a Mediterranean cruise and went to Spain, France, and Italy.

That was cool.

We’ve decided that—aside from giving generously and saving for college and retirement—we would rather spend money on experiences than things. We have discovered that we love to travel, so it is money well-spent. We’ve also made an annual tradition of a family vacation with our best friends from residency. We pick a place each year to meet and spend a week together with all of the kids (who went to preschool together, and are now in middle school and high school). So far: Colorado, Tennessee, Virginia, Michigan, Niagara Falls, Lake Erie, Florida. Up next: Washington, D.C. Our daughters also went together to work in a Vietnamese orphanage last summer. 

Here’s the bonus: after almost 18 years of marriage—struggle, pain, laughter, inside jokes, finishing each other’s sentences—we really enjoy traveling together. We really enjoy appreciating different cultures and landscapes and history together. I’m not sure we could have said that as newlyweds. 

So hang in there, MS wives and resident wives and fellowship wives. Dream big. Invest in each other. Build a big, glorious, messy life together. Stick it out.

It gets better.