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Lives of Doctor Wives: Where Do the Rings Go?

Friday, May 29, 2009

Where Do the Rings Go?

Just a fun little Friday post...

As a brand new MS4, R is about to engage in at least 3 months straight of surgical rotations. The rest of his year is sure to be filled with more surgery, maybe a little research, some vacation, and hopefully lots of traveling for interviews. After that, the surgery thing will [hopefully] be a regular activity.

So, for those of you who are married to surgeons a little farther along in the training, what does your husband do with his wedding ring (if he has one)?
I've thought about a chain, but I doubt R would wear that. If he just takes if off at the hospital before scrubbing in, I'm pretty sure he'd lose it every now and then. The prevailing idea would be for him to leave it at home, which will probably be what he does, but I'm just curious if your husbands do anything special with their wedding bands.
...does anyone else think about stuff like this or am I just a little nutty? :)

In anticipation of criticism, let me say that I realize at the end of the day, a wedding ring is just another piece of jewelry and that my husband's fidelity is in the hands of the man who wears (or doesn't wear) the ring. I'm also not trying to imply any stereotypes about doctors, nurses, social workers, patients, or anyone else in the hospital. I just know that I like wearing my ring at all times, particularly at work if I'm having a rough day. It's nice to look down at my hand and remember that great guy I get to spend my life with, so it'd be nice for R to have something like that, too, particularly with the long hours he'll have. This post is not meant to be about how to mark territory but rather just fun ways to address a common but overall insignificant problem.

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Blogger Heather said...

Great question. I've often wondered about the same thing. My husband is very likely to lose his ring if he takes it off. I've also thought about the chain, but again I don't know that he'd wear it.

May 29, 2009 at 11:48 AM  
Blogger Alexandra said...

This is so funny that you would ask this, because Bunny and I were discussing this the other night. Since he is an OB/GYN resident, there will be surgeries, c-sections and lots of instances where he will have to take off his ring. As of right now, he just takes it off and puts it in his pocket during surgery and then puts it back on right after. I was concerned that some day he might just strip off his nasty scrubs and it would get lost. We discussed him getting a chain, but he probably wouldn't take the time to put them on it or he was worried it would be in the way during surgery. So I guess he said he could put it in his locker/desk drawer, but again, that involves remembering it ahead of time, so I'm sure it will be in his pocket a lot. We both feel naked without our rings on, so I totally get what you are saying about wanting to wear it when not in surgery and any way, I'm not insecure about my sexy man, but I do like people knowing he is taken,hehe! So I guess I'll just keep praying he doesn't lose it, not like we could afford to replace it right now!

May 29, 2009 at 11:48 AM  
Blogger Jaidi and Justin Clayton and Family! said...

My husband is a soon to be 4th year as well. Whenever he has been going into any sort of surgery he wears his wedding ring on a chain around his neck. It hasn't gotten in the way for him. I am sure that there will be times he forgets it at home in the morning, as he is so used to just always having it on.

May 29, 2009 at 12:08 PM  
Blogger --Leann-- said...

you could buy him a cheap walmart version of a wedding ring to wear at work (they do have some fairly inexpensive ones). That way if he does lose it, it's not the one that you are emotionally attached to.

May 29, 2009 at 2:37 PM  
Blogger JLee said...

When I was working as a nurse I put my rings on a safety pin and put that on my name badge or scrub top. I guess surgeons tie them on the strings of their scrub pants. Here's a link...
Let me know what he does...my hubby is thinking ortho so we'll need some ideas.

May 29, 2009 at 3:13 PM  
Blogger MW said...

I like the drawstring idea! Not perfect, but the best I've seen so far, imo. :)

I like this comment from the linked blog:
"this way I can never take off my pants without remembering I'm married" LOL

R has actually already lost his original ring (which wasn't even the ring I put on him on our wedding day because it wasn't sized in time), so he just wears a simple $75 white gold band now. Wouldn't be the end of the world if he lost it, but $75 rings can add up if you have to keep replacing them!

May 29, 2009 at 3:47 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

M does the ring-on-string-thing, and it's worked well for him. The only time he lost his ring was when he was taking it off at home the night before his surgical day and somehow it ended up in my sock drawer. Sigh. Those doctors. :)

May 29, 2009 at 4:48 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

I stand slightly corrected. He informs me that he puts his ring on his watch band (an Ironman velcro thing) and ties his watch to his scrubs.

May 29, 2009 at 4:52 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

When he was in residency, B always tied his rings (his wedding ring and the "promise" ring I gave him when we were dating) to the drawstrings of his scrub pants. He's never lost them that way. Now that he's practicing and not in surgery all the time, I believe he wears them to the office, though I'm not sure what he does with them while there. He probably just wears gloves over them. He still ties them to the drawstrings of his scrub pants when he's at the hospital. I've always thought that was a great idea. It's nice to see others do it as well!

May 29, 2009 at 9:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What wedding ring? My husband lost his during his MS1 year while playing foosball with fellow med students. *I was there...I know that is what he was doing*...ha-ha...so was AJ---remember that one? Anyway, he put it in his pocket because it hurt to have it on (playing foosball while wearing a wedding band is apparantly not condusive to finger health), and the pocket had a loving hole in it. We didn't notice the ring gone until later.

Personally, when I have to take off my rings, I put them on my key chain. That always works for me.

Oh, and by the way, I will be having another ring handmade one day...it will look exactly like his original. The expense is the payment for his "misguided" mistake in putting his ring in his pants while playing foosball.

May 29, 2009 at 9:56 PM  
Blogger Melisa said...

Brad does the scrub strings too. Who knew it was so popular? I'm still laughing about "can't take it off without remembering you are married" bit. LOL!

May 29, 2009 at 10:36 PM  
Blogger Married to a med student - Marissa Nicole said...

Ditto - Drew ties him to his scrubs strings as well (and he even has a necklace he could put them on but prefers to tie them to his scrubs)

May 30, 2009 at 12:44 AM  
Blogger Kathi Browne said...

I'm going to be the dessenter of the group: My husband left his ring at home and for good reason... GERMS!

When a physician wears a chain, tie, or anything else decorative, it comes in contact with a lot of bad germs and has the potential to spread them around to others. My husband learned this through an experience he had...

One day M was examining a patient when the patient threw up. M had to change shirts, wash his hands/feet, and change shoes before returning to rounds. All day long, he continued to smell this aweful smell. He repeatedly examined his whole body to find the source of the smell. Finally, at the end of the day, he discovered one speck of puke on the tube of his stethescope which had been hanging around his neck. he never forgot that lesson and to this day advocates leaving ties, rings, and other such items at home to minimize spreading germs.

We're not naive to the fact that missing rings invite bad behavior, but rather than push the ring thing, just join him for lunch at the hospital more often. Don't be a stranger there, even if it means bringing cookies to the nurses station. Let him know that although the ring may be absent, you aren't.

May 30, 2009 at 8:56 AM  
Blogger aj said...

my husband didn't wear his at all, left it at home...didn't bother me. i second the germ thing, yuk!

yes, jennifer, i remember...you were the first one i thought of when i read this blog entry!

May 31, 2009 at 10:27 PM  

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